The Happiest Baby on the Block

One of the first books I read about raising a baby was called The Happiest Baby on the Block. In between morning sickness and exhaustion, reading it made me feel more prepared for parenting and confident about how I would care for my child during the first three months. The book not only explains how to create a "womb-like" experience for baby, but also why it works so well. It made sense to keep baby in a familiar environment at first. Plus, the two world cultures that continue to practice the techniques experience no symptoms of colic in babies. Not to mention, the baby on the cover of the book looked as happy as any I had ever seen!

Dr. Harvey Karp recommends techniques for building trust to reassure baby in her new home. He suggests using the 5 S's and consistently responding to baby's needs throughout the first three months. Of course babies need to be fed and changed, but after that you can comfort them with the cuddle cure- a combination of the 5 soothing suggestions detailed here. It's a challenge caring for a newborn, so I appreciated having a set of instructions that would ultimately help build a connection with my baby.

Now that Hannah is four months old, I'm happy to report that she is undoubtedly the happiest baby on the block. She's confident expressing her needs and responds appreciatively after they are met. I feel lucky to be the one who gets to feed her, change her diapers, and lull her to sleep because it has helped build a strong bond of trust between us. Our house is regularly filled with coos, giggles, and the sounds of excitement. It makes me the happiest Mommy on the block!

This Little Mommy Stayed Home by Samantha Wilde: Book Review

“Think of the funniest person you know, give her a baby and a month without sleep, multiply by ten, and you’ve got the incomparable Samantha Wilde rocking the hilariously appalling realities of motherhood and the modern marriage.” Karen Karbo

Joy is stumbling through the first year of Motherhood with a husband who works 24/7, a monster mother-in-law, and a loveable baby boy. Her humorous take on everything from her mother’s impending fourth marriage to a crush on her steamy yoga teacher, mixed with the everyday trials of first-time motherhood will have you poring through this page turner.

She starts in a seemingly normal situation for many new moms, having recently relocated to the suburbs of New York for her husband’s work. This brings them closer to her opinionated mother-in-law, who balks at everything Joy does as a parent. It’s no help that her absentee husband has begun siding with his Mother on top of everything else he does to get on her nerves. She has a hilarious breakdown from the bathroom when her husband asks her where she keeps the diapers. Is it possible that it’s been so long since he changed the baby?

Amidst all this, a stream of amusing characters parade through Joy’s day-to-day. Her flirtatious yoga instructor and former college boyfriend keep the romance sparking even as it flickers out of her marriage. She’s accompanying her Mother on too many pre-wedding errands to allow enough time to cyber-stalk her future Father-in-law. As if she didn’t already have her hands full with a new baby! So, if you can find a few minutes to yourself or if you can manage to hold a book while nursing your baby, I highly recommend this one. Any other Moms read any great books lately? Let us know!

Becoming an expert on Hannah

If Zac could throw out every book I've ever read on pregnancy or child rearing, he would do it in a heartbeat. But, as much as he would like to raise our daughter by figuring it out as we go along, he can't deny that she is truly thriving from some of the expert advice. He is still a strong and true reminder that our little girl will not likely fit any mold, and she needs personalized care. Which is why I'm excited and nervous to be doing it myself.

How will I know we're on the right track? When Hannah greets me with a smile post-nap or pauses while nursing to flash a toothless grin at me. I'll know it when she sails through a new experience confidently with me by her side. It'll be clear when I no longer hear wails as she cries, but individual and unique statements telling me exactly what she needs.

Every once in a while the books may give some looney advice. On the other hand, they might even make a suggestion I desperately want to follow, only to find that it definitely doesn't work for Hannah. That's the great thing about striving to become an expert on one little girl. I don't have to be a perfect Mom, I just have to be her perfect Mom and I can't help but feel like it's going well as I watch this amazing little girl grow.

EASY Does It

Sorry Zac, I think Hannah has given up on plotting her evil takeover of the world. She's too busy having sweet dreams! It's about 4 weeks since we first started following the daily pattern of Eat, Activity, Sleep, Your Time and I'm ready to make a confident review that it works for us! We started gradually and modified it a bit, but I think we all have the hang of it now. Hannah is really the star of the show because she always knows what's going on. Luckily she keeps the rest of us on track and sets the pace for the day.

I won't say that it's easy to raise an infant, but this is certainly helping. We still have our share of ups and downs (wake UP early; wish I could lay DOWN.) The big difference is that I feel like I'm doing what's right for the whole family now. In the past, I was overwhelmed by trying to keep up with the house and take care of Hannah. I rarely made it past "laundry" on the to do list. It's a great feeling that I can give her all my attention during those joyful moments just after she eats while we play. I relish in the sweetness of putting her to sleep on my shoulder as her hair tickles my face. When she first lays down for her nap, I fold laundry or check my email so I can stay close to her. Then I bask in the freedom of her nice, long naps and race through the rest of my to-dos!

Of course, Hannah is my number one priority. But part of that is making sure she has a great home and family to grow up in. If having a clean house reduces everyone's stress, then that's the first thing I do during "Y Time." Later in the evening Zac and I finally have time to relax together with a nice meal. When Hannah first came home I kept thinking in horror how difficult it would be to go through raising an infant, or worse, suffering morning sickness with another child. Now, I've finally realized how it's done and I can't wait till we get the chance to have a second baby.

Winding Down

4:23. I'm getting the impression that most babies respond well to routine. Every parent probably has a particular way to aid a baby from wakefulness to dreamland and they follow that pattern because it works. What works for my baby bear?

We take it easy in the afternoon since mornings are generally pretty stimulating with the activity gym, belly time, and regular photo shoots. She was sleepy right after her 3:30 meal so I took her into the nursery, checked her diaper, and bundled her in the swaddle. After that her eyes brightened right up so we sat in the glider and I mimicked her facial expressions and gurgles. She loves this and I can tell her next big trick will be blowing raspberries since she watches carefully with shock and awe when I do it. She has already mastered blowing bubbles, making kiss noises, and of course sticking out her tongue. Although her smile is captivating, she makes one expression I can't match, which I can already tell will become her "get out of jail free" face to her Dada. Ah but here's the yawn. We're ready to work on snoozing!

I tiptoe over with her and shut off the light, put her on my shoulder and pat her back while making shhhh sounds for ten minutes. She takes this surprisingly well and relaxes deeply until she calmly allows me to rest her in her crib. I continue shushing, sit back in my chair, and prepare to wait five minutes to make sure she gets to sleep. We're almost there, Mama is relaxing, and then... she pees. So I change her and we start all over. Except this time the sweet shoulder patting has turned into the snuggle olympics. She writhes, climbs and flails in her snuggle time snooze sack but she does calm enough to take a 20 minute snooze.

And so, we do this in variations seven times each day. Even with the repetition, every day is still a new day. In fact, I think she just sneezed and did a raspberry at the same time.

Starting with a Whisper

4:37. There's something so tender about having a baby fall asleep on your shoulder. After she's calm from your voice and your touch you can feel her relax and begin to drift. Cheek to cheek, take a moment to notice the softness of her skin before laying her down for a delightful snooze. Of course, it wasn't always like this.  In fact, during the last nap she fitfully woke every 15 minutes after tentatively calming down only to fully wake up to an explosive poo just as I was about to doze off in the glider.  But it's worth it to wake up to see her adoring smile as she gratefully accepts a new diaper.

The Baby Whisperer describes Hannah as a spirited baby. She's overzealous and captivating when she's happily awake. Conversely, she quickly expresses even the smallest baby matters with her growing voice. When my Aunt visited and quoted Hannah's cries we agreed that she was obviously saying, "Gimme that dam milk!" or "Get me outta this dam diaper!" But she's so loveable and appreciative when she gets it. Which is why I've been poring over the two 300+ page informational books from the Whisperer. Since Hannah so clearly knows what she wants, I figure I better find out what it is and get it for her!

We started with a routine about 2 weeks ago, per the suggestion of the first book. Immediately, we saw a change in her personality during her awake hours. Since she knew to anticipate that she would wake up, get fed, have a diaper change, play, and then fall back asleep she playfully followed along as we went through the cycle 7-9 times each day. But something wasn't quite right because the matter of getting her to sleep was getting more and more difficult. Plus, even if this was manageable I still wasn't sure what to do next as she continues to mature through her baby stages.

Fast forward to today and we are on Day 4 of the new regime. This time around we're building in a winding down step before each nap, focusing on keeping more activity in the morning, and following a strict schedule for the first week. Things are different! In the morning, she's more alert for her feeds and even if she wakes up early from a nap she can hang in until the next time she's supposed to eat. We're still struggling through the "getting-to-sleep" bit, but this is an adjustment phase. Through all this, I relate a lot of what she's doing to her father's behavior. I used to immediately feed her when she would wake up at 5, but now I realize that she's crying for a new diaper and once she gets that she moans that it's too early to wake up just like Zac would. So I coax her back to sleep and she wakes up at 7 with bright eyes and actively eats. In the afternoon she's so excited about everything she's done each day that she wants to stay awake all the time (again Zac's MiniMe.)

I'll report back next week, hopefully with news that her daytime napping has improved. For now I better sleep while baby sleeps!